Drunk people, please make sure you have someone to watch you if you do stupid things when drinking. A woman came into the ER waiting room yesterday, laid on several chairs, and began touching herself. She looked to be in her fifties. The registration clerk looked at me and said, “Can you go talk to her.” I looked over and there she was masturbating in front of about fifteen other people. I was currently with a hypertensive patient in a wheelchair in need of an EKG. I quickly spoke to and assessed her to be sure no stroke symptoms or something emergent. She smelled of strong alcohol odor. I told the clerk call security. I came back out to the waiting room area and she was now standing and stumbling. A wheelchair was offered to her and she refused by stating ‘Go f*#!k yourself’. One of the other charge nurses was standing with her to be sure she didn’t fall. We asked if she wanted to be seen as a patient and she said no. The police were called, but of course they didn’t come for  about another hour. She went outside, laid down on the sidewalk in front of the entrance, spread her legs, pulled up her shirt and began touching herself again and yelled out,”Don’t you f*#!*#*g touch me! I know my god damn rights.”  Wow. Really? Only in the ER.

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